My Head Hurts

I think it might have been that medicinal Jolly Rancher. It amazes me the state of GOING to places and inspiring people to GO and what happens if you don't GO, and if they don't GO, and you should GO, and can we GO already, let's get things GOING...

Legendary Lowrider Soul DJ Night in LA. Tonight! Check It.

So I'm in Los Angeles, and my bros Dave Mata and Steven LaGroue are in from Chicago, and they're DJ-ing a slew of nights, including the notorious Funky Sole at the Echo this Saturday, which grows a line so long you'd think there's some "American Idol: Soul Train" in the works.

But the show to go to is tonight, Friday, at this place called Los Globos in Silver Lake (3040 W Sunset Blvd, 10pm, $3), which I can only describe as a gritty maze of glowing colors, like if an acid trip flashed you back to your gramma's living room — and that room had a suit of armor in it. But check out this sick line-up, these guys will be spinning rare and classic sweet soul sounds, adopted as "lowrider jams" or "gangster oldies" by the fine folks of East LA.

Ruben Molina
Author of "The Old Barrio Guide to Low Rider Music" and "Chicano Soul: Recordings & History of an American Culture." So the guy who wrote the book(s) on lowrider music — literally — will be there DJ-ing.

Andy Noble
Founding bassist of Kings Go Forth, this 10-piece powerhouse of a soul orchestra from Milwaukee. The stage drips with soul when these guys perform.

E Da Boss
Lead singer of Myron & E, former Blackalicious DJ, and current Stones Throw recording artist.

Scott Craig
Notorious vinyl collector who used to manage Reckless Records in Wicker Park, founded Detroit's legendary Funk Night party, and now owns Records LA, a SoCal store known for the quality of its rare 45s.

Dave Mata/Steven LaGroue (aka Impala Sound)
These two helped build Chicago's monthly free soul dance party, Soul Summit, into one of the slickest dance parties the Double Door has ever seen. And they run an artist/show space called Impala. And they have a lot of records. And they're just nice guys, say hi.

Can you find the suit of armor below? (And the first picture below is of the same bar above, the colors change! Nerd.) Seriously though check this out tonight, I will be there. Los Globos in Silver Lake, 3040 W Sunset Blvd, 10pm, $3.

The Pinnacle of Child Safety Contraptions

I was psyched that the Beverly Center bathrooms had these handy contraptions so that I could safely secure my baby while I used the facilities. If I lost my baby — if she crawled out underneath the door while I was dropping a deuce, and someone scooped her up — I would just die.

More Pictures: Stylist Brad Goreski VS. Brad Majors From Rocky Horror Picture Show

"I call this look, From Brad Majors' Bedroom to Professional Vroom-Vroom."—Stylist Brad Goreski

Ginormous Gummi Bear or Sex Toy? You Decide.

Can I Bring a PC Into the Apple Store to Get Fixed?

Of course not, right? So why, when I walked into the Apple Store today holding my laptop — and told the guy that I had a One-To-One appointment for GarageBand — did he say to me: "For your Mac?"

No, for my banana.

Stylist Brad Goreski's Inspiration: Brad Majors from Rocky Horror Picture Show...?

I know this is a stretch for most of the population — a reality-show stylist (the former assistant of Rachel Zoe) and dip into a 1975 fringe film — but if you get this comparison, leave me a comment, you are one of my new best friends.

Brad Goreski should have Barry Bostwick, who played Brad Majors, as a guest on his "It's a Brad, Brad World" show...and then it would truly be "Brad, Brad"!